More like 3% watchable. Or 81% likely to give you a headache. Here’s a howler of a sequel to kids’ animation 100% Wolf that picks up the story of Freddy Lupin (voiced by Ilai Swindells), the teenage heir to an illustrious family of werewolves. In the last movie poor Freddy discovered that by the light of the full moon, he transforms into a fluffy neon-pink poodle. The sheer silliness of the original was entertaining and it trotted along with zip and fun. The new film is so frenetic that adults might be tempted to preload on painkillers.

This time around Freddy is still feeling miffed, still disrespected by the pack. Desperate, he prays to the moon spirits for divine intervention. A naughty spirit baby called Moopoo (Elizabeth Nabben) takes pity and transforms Freddy into a werewolf. Then little Moopoo crashes down to Earth, and there’s a witch involved, played by Jennifer Saunders (really she deserves better than this). Somehow it’s all very dull and chaotic.

200% Wolf reminded me of the kids’ series that pad out streaming sites – the shows you’ve never heard of, less funny and cheaper-looking knock-offs of the more popular ones. My seven-year-old viewing buddy lasted less than 10 minutes. Not even a cash incentive could keep her in front of the screen. So she missed the film’s one decent dog joke. When baby moon spirit Moopoo vomits, Freddy’s pooch pals fall silent in front of the pile of sick. Then one pipes up: “Who gets to eat it?”

• 200% Wolf is in UK and Irish cinemas from 20 September.